September Theme: Kasi Hooks and Crooks
Roll dice, Get BEE deal, what else!
Wow what a theme! EH POP… a o re gaye laas! This will be familiar to magents who lost anything from watches, cars to wives. Or ladies who lost groicery money, expensive gifts and husbands. You get a brother who “survives” through the dice game and keeps on going back to “win” no matter how much they lose. This goes for ladies who don’t bother to upgrade their eeducation or get employment because of the card game makes money. Even if it means spending day and night playing and drinking while ignoring house chores and poor husbands and kids if they have any. The trick is in winning they believe.. You win by taking risk with every cent you make hoping you will make a fortune.. Damn! If u r the host hay pay you rent for the venue and buy booze from you while others seek loans as well to play even more.
What about a fine BEE brother or sister?
If they have company or close corporation documents, you are promised a big chunk of the tender they are about to embark on provided you pay your investment upfront. A month or even a year later you are told the deal did not work out and you should not give up for they now have :SERIOUS CONNECTIONS”. You are also informed that your investment was very minute compared to the fortune they lost. Those who indeed secure tenders will buy a posh car then buy faulty or cheap material which are below the project specifications , bribe the inspector with a small amount leaving their own communities with non quality work
What fascinates me even more is thugs who will say your grandpa headache powder as cocaine and ofcourse at cocaine price! Because youd be a junkie and having already and the actual staff all that asprin will make you high. Wa latlha, wa nokiwa jo!
You buy a stolen cellphone with no charger or simcard. Get a charger for that model three weeks later and find out its not working. Then the crook suggests you take the phone to this kuli he knows and he will fix it for the small fortune. Eventually they give u a cheaper model fix the one u paid for and go 50 5O! U CANT TAKT THEM TO THE POLICE OR DEMAND YOUR MONEY THE DEAL IS ILLICIT ha ha ha! 
Last but not least how interesting is it that you are robbed of the unique pair of shoes at night. The following morning a thug from your street exchanges with a friend and scores himself another new stolen pair. On other occasions they just change the colour or shoe laces. Worst is when they try selling them to you.
Was it worth it?
What do young men and women get up to day in day out? Is it a plot to boom the next ATM or to hustle and get a job. What use is it? to wake up and take the last R5 grab a cab (not that a local taxi will cost that R5 cause it’s much more expensive), get to the next metal pressing factory to see more of guluva's like you looking for a job.
Day-in, day-out you never loose strength to wake up again and go look for that ever-eluding job just to "get by".
One day, ntja ya hao, passes with Gusheshe and some kasi flavared honey and theu invite to tag along to a happening spot. Next thing you ask what he does, Yes Guluva does what we call "Affirmative action shopping", taking from the rich and giving to the poor. He makes R2000 a night, flashes R200 notes like its that Tupac Music Video.
I could live this like. You think!
Reality hits home - I dont have anything to eat tonight. Ntanga needs a friend" to help him with a deal he needs to pull. I can drive the get-away car, and at least I will make a grand. No sweat.
Yes I am now making the money, (blood involved). I forgot about home cause mama doesn't want blood money. I cannot get out of that life even when things turn sour. You want out, Ntanga tells you its the last "job", then you are out.
Hit the road, looking for that one moment to hit a hi-jack. Next thing, you are shot, fighting for your life.
Was it worth it? Was the grand a night living your life in fear of cops running into you, worth it? Was losing your family cause they did not approve of your ways of making money, worth it?
Tomorrow you getting buried. Its a "celebration-febes" of your worthless life at a place of rest.
The Cemetery - Was that a dignified burial you got? Was the family "compensated" for your loss? They are more indebted in funeral cost now that you are gone. They are ashamed of your life. They wanna forget you.
Was it worth it?
Hate queues get connections
South Africa, South Africa, bafwethu mara why ha! Is it laziness or just like to hurry up and get things done. Some of you have been doing this since crech, ka sgela a sebolela. Bele ya transie ele vroeg or late you wanna be the first on the bus, ko sgela assembly no line ono ema nje, the next you need a hook up ya homework.
Some of you have grown up to master this no queuing thing and simply juts wlalk through like you work there. I have seen people going in the bank they would check the line and if long the simply go straight and ask for a bank tellers name. Start making some accusations about the a transaction that never happened and go on to say “while you at it before I forget, please pass me the deposit slip“ and there they go their work is done.
Ok let me be easy on you, how did you get your license, really! So how about your friend, you know most you mense fromkasi got it through connections else how did you get, come on really just say “stena”, white people wont get it Indians that’s another story. Speaking of Indians let me not not go there, but my friend cheap stuff they got it.
Being a lady or bitchy has nothing do with how your dress. Its about how you present your self around others and situation affecting your. You want a definition of a lady, I give a desperate Housewife named Bree, she knows how to compose herself, perfection is not just the key but presentation too. She doesn’t get herself mixed up in things that will hurt her profiles, sure we all have our downs but a lady does show it she meet with support (shrink) privately.
Personally I would wait on the queue if there is a reason too mara if I know somebody that knows somebody they wait on line when you could just walk through like, why not pay when you got money to spend besides is not like tjotjo but clearance fee after we pay admin fees and bank charges for waiting on queue.
For a Moment, I was serious
August Theme: Kasi Bitchy or Lady Like
Generating Lady Like
As my friend will always say to piss of the girls “O tshwana le Karabo ke sefebe sa ko Generation” for some reassn he is right. Karabo has slept with almost every man ko Generation even Jack Mabaso who knows but she has been discrete some of us, we turn to forget gore le Sibusiso had a thang with her unless ditshele di tsoga. What makes her, a lady, is nothing else but good looks, a woman who is content and in business and that gives her a chance in the lady like profile.
As bomraper will say “Where my bitches at?” Lets go with the need – isdingos Lettie Matabane that girl she is bitchy I wouldn’t wanna see myself coming across her. She knows how to keep it down but when ish hits the fan all hell brake loose. Lets put rhythm into this city Sunee, that’s not bitchy that hustling. Sunee has what you call means and ways of doing things she is a great pretender that would fool anyone in my category she falls under a hustler.
Generating a lady is not that easy, Generation has more of young girls, you wont be a able to tell who will grow into a lady even Dineo Mashaba herself with all that money she still looks like a student. In terms of who is evil I mean bitchy, two face chick, Bridget comes out tops.
Being a lady or bitchy has nothing do with how your dress. Its about how you present your self around others and situation affecting your. You want a definition of a lady, I give a Desperate Housewife named Bree, she knows how to compose herself, perfection is not just the key but presentation too. She doesn’t get herself mixed up in things that will hurt her profiles, sure we all have our downs but a lady does show it she meet with support (shrink) privately.
Black lady likes take Janet Jackson in “Why did I get married” and the lady in “Dairy of and black woman”. even in polotics, Condelse Rice
Now as bomraper will say “Where my ladies at?” and the groupies will go “Right hey” whereas a lady will be smiling and nodding back. And oh just because you drink whine does not mean you are lady, you could be an alcoholic.
Two sides of a lady
Around our kasi’s, we have all kinds of women. There are those lady like, di straat meisie, bull fighters, bitchy ones and marriage materials. Two of those whom are sometimes compared are: the bitchy ones and the ladylike ones.
When we talk about a lady, we talk about a person who respects herself, if she has been defeated; she accepts, doesn’t fight and congratulates the victor with pride. A lady takes pride in everything she does; she makes sure everything in her path is up to perfection and that people around her look up to her. A lady dresses to impress, walks with pride and molds her voice whiles speaking. A perfect example of a lady would be Bree in Desperate Housewives; she tries to change her friends to be like her. She has integrity and pride; she doesn’t like it if things go wrong on her side. But also; she sometimes has a time where she just wants to scream out the pain she’s in and show people that she also does hurt.
Now coming to those bitchy ladies, they are noisy, don’t have direction about their lives, want to take out everything on their path to victory, they don’t play fair, they scheme and manipulate to get what they want and end up mixing with wrong people or being on the wrong side of the law. Another thing about them is that they are always wasted from alcohol and drugs. If we look @ South African Actresses, I think we can find that the perfect character to portray the part of a bitchy lady in our article would be Doobsie in Muvhango, how in the Heaven did she convince Edward to marry her instead of our favorite Thandaza? How she managed to bribe her way into Mukwevho Milling and convince Eddie that our beautiful Busi is his daughter? You can clearly see that manipulation takes much part in those bitchy ladies’ lives. It’s never a dull day when they are around because if you enjoy the company of those kinds of ladies, you would be following their every move.
Sweetheart vs Lenyora
I hate the gender roles built by society irrespective of the root. Moreover I fear God and know where I have to stand as a women.
Worse I cannot change my genetic makeup unless I want to get oestrogen and progesterone injections that can suppress my dangerous testosterone. Oh yes I do have a thick voice, I do have beared and I do catch a bull by its horns and a man by his balls. I do not take nonsense . like the wise say “Attitude makes u or break u”. well mine takes me places, scares away boys who think they are men and make abo sweetheart think I’m mean and disrespectful because I’m not pushed over like them.
My anger erupts like lava from volcano and that’s when you wil get my bitchy deal at its level best. That’s when I will belittle, destroy and rearrange everything that turns itself into a pain in the backside. Its called bad temper and leads people into trouble but I’ve never been jailed . I guess its not bad temper but bad tamper meaning do not tamper with me or else…
I love something about myself as lenyora. I’m there to protect abo sweetheart when abo playa messes with them be it at work, home or just a taxi. Am I a feminist? Maybe yes maybe not! No man should mess with ladies in front of for the volcano shall erupt. On the other side please do remember that I’m a women, just cursed or maybe blessed with a bit more testerotesterone than average women. I have my moments of breaking down and sobbing and that’s where the sweethearts personalities come handy for they shall treat me like a baby. Something I appreciate but hate as soon as the tears are dried out. I’M SUPPOSED TO BE THE STRONG ONE remember!
July Theme: Kasi Technologies
Evolution with Technology
My new Oxford English Dictionary describes evolution as the process by which different kind of living organisms develop from early form ro simply gradual development. Hence technology is described as the application of scientific knowledge for practical purpose. Thus it will be right to say we humans evolve with technology…
Observing kasi ways with technology, I coul say I’m a paradox. Plus Minus years ago, kasi people were wearing nikes swimming shoes as fashion statement, did they know they were meant for swimming? Why then don’t they have more swimming pools ekasi. Nowadays many are into Adidas and Lacoste tennis shoes, need I say more. This is relevant to my we have less computer literate people but have more people writing music for a living on Nero.
Why are we not evolving with technology completely but instead choose only parts that are for fashion, money and crime. We have hackers, illegal music and video writers, people who overwrite stolen computers and cellphones. How about creating software for disadvantage people, supporting artist and actors as well and putting more into upliftment programmes.
South Africa would not be short of technical skills, technical drawers and not outsource overseas people. Come on let’s not just use technology on cellphones for music and pornography. Move over, take a neighbour regardless of age and teach them what finger to use on the keyboard and let them learn how to use MS-Office to write plans, do budget and programs including presentation with Powerpoint than projecting only movies on our walls.
Computer Shops Tsa Kasi
Heita mense! Nowadays you don't see people going ko-town to the Internet shops to type CV yako spanneng se mpintshi amo-promisitseng sona, they just go to the one ko next door being called SIS BETTY'S Internet shop.
If you really check it out, kasi has improved since the Apartheid era's being that we didn't have things like this, nowadays we have bo Ngamla coming to kasi and now it has even improved even better we have bo di Internet shops next door.
But the sad thing kadi hulle dinge is dat, most of the computers we use around here are stolen from somebody and maybe from you yourself whose using it, but you won't know until ushapa di investigations tse itseng to know.
But the good thing is nowadays lerona mona mokasi, we can google-nyana and check out the latest things happening around Mzantsi or Orkant
SHO GENTS! Much love
... And we still go Manual
Have you ever notice, think about it how many of us have microwaves only to switch on when cousins and friend are around. Notice how your ou-lady a defroster daai frozen chicken/braai pack, She always puts it on the sink or on top of the fridge depending gore how big is your fridge, why cant she just use the microwave.
It was not long ago (b4 millennium) when I was impressed by the garage door le le ipulang, then came in the gates that opens themselves, Currently ko kasi wa a dibala di electric garage doors and you cant even notice them cost people still go manual on this things.
Talking bout manual, you we know how Verimark advertise good new stuffs right, but still last you know somebody open the KOO baked beans ka thipa right, how manual can we get when even our car repairs still uses the screw drive or wheel spanners, haven’t they heard of Bosch, I guess there are reasons behind this like electricity, cash and cost.
One other phenomena is they issue of airtime, “Nka keraya kae airtime” or “Sorry a witse gore barekisa kae airtime”, Mense ken hulle gottes and undrestandt your phone and services that comes through with it. Airtime can be bought directly from your phone just dail *111# vodacom owes me now.
The only things manual we never get to do is changing tv channels, you know we got remotes right ene battery gadifele daar just give it slap and it work.
The influence and development of Technology
First thing in my mind was not electronic development, a kitsi gore why mara that’s what I see construction in terms of self development. Nou dusty road is irrelevant we are getting more into DVD’s and Plasma’s tse majita ba di shapang huis braak for nyaope and survival reasons
Nou ge re vaya ka weekend ele 21st ya Rethabile or graduation party ya Zandile o kreya DJ a di tshentsha ka di DVD, mara not long ago ne e le tsona Di CD mo di-partying before cassette ne ele yona e tshwereng makete. Malome wa ka still have di LP tsa Bob Marley le Lucky Dube.
Technology is also influenced by our level of study and self development, I mean If Ben a na le PC for educational purpose, it adds value to the younger brothers and sisters ko habo if he is not selfish ka gore sometimes batho ba rata go timana.
Inventions and creativity FromKasi di skars mara if you read the news paper, you will find gore mvana o i’rile mochine somewhere at the age of 17. Technology is there, well not like in overseas, rona we apply it mostly in the work environment, however o tsene ko bo Jonas o keraya TV e sena eriele mara ebereka pila fela ka hangara. That’s how good we understand and can make life easier from our wisdom also save cost.
Kasi nou e tsenelletse as you can see le di kara tsa teng have remotes, ge o tshwere, phone ese ya camera wa bora, ka prospective e e tletseng bongwana.
All in all however re influencer ke go tsamaya le dinako.
I cant wait to see the day ke invita ngwana ko gae e be fridge ya ka e mo chamang.
June Theme: Kasi Youth and Clubs
The Crave Club
See my girls and I have this really sweet club we belong to. We call it the “CRAVE” club. You won’t believe di-policies tsa teng, alright its like this:
- There are no do’s and don’ts
- No special rules or regulations
- And absolutely no boundaries
- Just a lot of different attitudes that urged to follow the “CRAVING”
So Girl 1 loves food and we love her. She’ll eat anything she craves and should she not get what she wants then hell breaks loose. Second Girl the sweet-tooth of the club, ga e yo sweet a sa ejeng. We even joke that if she ever dqares to look back at the past then o tlo fetoga mosadi wa Lota, instead of turning into a pillar of salt, she’ll be a pillar of sugar.
Next is the character! (Girl 3), her craving for spatlho can never be fulfilled. Don’t be folloed, she’ nothing like girl 1. Then there’s me, the crave master. Box ya Craven “A” gets me through my terrible school days and most importantly it betrays the craving.
Yep! That’s it, our very own club. We get together every Friday ko Kwasa to chase yet another craving: Hot guys and shooters, and again no rules and regulations, except this time, o batlang go fambola must not forget iCondom.
Wanna join the club
Fresh blood always finds ways
Wow! Lets go way back, when kasi youth would be fulltime church goers. For what? Night vigils and revivals. Need I say how many babies and alcoholics came out of this? Girls would dress smartly in their shortest uniform seeking attention and attraction. Abo playa, back then macutie and pontsola (maybe mahipie), would be planning which shaba or liquor to use as a catalyst to taxi seat sex. Well that was then n maybe few of the youth population still do it!
21st century ones are classic, hook them with a debate, dance or acting club, constructive yet destructive. Championship mixed with drugs, booze, sex and over indictment lifestyle. Good ones however go to the clubs for the purpose and are called snobs or dibari.
I see a humongous problem, various youth clubs are no longer motivational like latter, most prefer the socializing ones called socials. Its in rare cases that ideas are born. Never the less youth shall choose their own club style.
Much love
Youth try joining societies
Don’t you start kadi YOUTH AND CLUBS, because nowadays some of our youth are no more drinking ko IVY's TAVERN or sitting ko di corneng playing dices they've become responsible, yeh ungizwile "RESPONSIBLE".
On SUNDAYS rather than having a huge hangover from yesterdays bash or having beers to relieve stress sa bapalaas, they go to societies, "heh kewakgubutsa", SOCIETIES, it is very weird because we only knew that as our mothers were the only ones to go because they don't want trouble when somebody from the family has passed, to avoid relying on collection from the community or the church people.
Our youth have matured now because most of them go to societies, because they've seen the wrongs of their parents who have not joined these societies as they will end up suffering from it.
Ka di-Sunday o tla ba bona in uniform, kadi pantyhose and a skirt with a matching top tsa ko strateng or with my nice black pants and a white shirt with a tie, but knowing well that they've not paid society for the past 3 months and they are gona make them start over again. from the society leaks the information to the neighbours then its all over. But in any case it does not matter, in today’s 21 century youth are doing good by going to societies and making their mama's and dads very proud of them.
But kuwafana as long ko strateng bao bona and think you have money for society it does not matter unless someone
SHO GENTS